"If we do everything with love, every day will become an adventure. The Holy Spirit will transform even our boredoms and drudgeries into chances for love and service."                                                 
                                                                         — from Living the Sacraments

Free, full, faithful, fruitful

I've been picking up "No Man is an Island" by Thomas Merton a lot, and I have to say that I love it :) Its definitely one of those reads that's been hard to get through...not because it's difficult to understand but because moments after I begin, I come across an inspiring word, thought, or idea and get stuck on it. It's so hard to move on.

But one recurring theme for me has been simply the nature of love. Merton writes that "A happiness that is sought for ourselves alone can never be found: for a happiness that is diminished by being shared is not big enough to make us happy. There is a false and momentary happiness in self-satisfaction, but it always leads to sorrow because it narrows and deadens our spirit. True happiness is found in unselfish love, a love which increases in proportion as it is shared...Infinite sharing is the law of God's inner life."

I'm sure this was really hard for me to grasp as a little girl. I would never have understood that happiness and love increased in the proportion that I shared what I had with others. My most precious things (sadly just stuff like toys, candy, etc.) were exactly that - "mine." I was so misguided in thinking that to share would be to diminish my joy. And as we grow, we continue to live off of a false self-satisfaction. We don't see the need to share. I think that's why it's so easy as a growing Christian to fall into the same way of thinking. I did this myself for so long. After knowing and accepting Christ, I was content to live my faith in isolation from others.  Sadly, we can desire closeness to God but not see the need to share our faith in communion with other believers.

Or we can even experience who Christ is, but not have a zealous longing that others know Him that, in turn, inspires us to share with those who do not believe. We focus on "our" walk with God, and even being in a community only serves the purpose of keeping us rooted. It can easily always become about what we receive. But we were made for true oneness - oneness with Christ and oneness with each other. So that just as His Word describes, "We, though many, are one body in Christ." Our Lord reminds us that we are to share what we have received and to "make disciples of all nations" so that all may come to witness and share in the life of God. We are called to selfless faith, and to give without cost.

Merton goes on to describe this exchange of love in relation to our friendships with others:

       "Love not only prefers the good of another to my own, but it does not even compare the two. It has only one good. that of the beloved, which is, at the same time, my own. Love shares the good with another not by dividing it with him, but by identifying itself with him so that his good becomes my own. The same good is enjoyed in its wholeness by two in one spirit, not halved and shared by two souls. Where love is really disinterested, the lover does not even stop to inquire whether he can safely appropriate for himself some part of the good which he wills for his friend. Love seeks its whole good in the good of the beloved, and to divide that good would be to diminish love. Such a division would not only weaken the action of love, but in doing so would also diminish its joy. For love does not seek a joy that follows from its effect: its joy is in the effect itself, which is the good of the beloved. Consequently, if my love be pure I do not even have to seek for myself the satisfaction of loving. Love seeks one thing only: the good of the one loved. It leaves all the other secondary effects to take care of themselves. Love, therefore, is its own reward."

May God help us to love each other in this way and know that "love given freely becomes what it ought to be" ("Ought to be", Audrey Assad).

A sweet revelation

So, I recently posted about waiting on the Lord and a lot of times this brings a lot of questions like, "Well, how long is this wait going to be?" or "where will it lead?". Most of the time, I don't know those answers. And that's okay; It's probably best. For the more uncertainty and insufficiency we find in and of ourselves, the more we cling to the One who is great and glorious - always certain and fully sufficient. In those times of despair, anxiety, and helplessness...it is there that we meet Christ.

And as I turn to Him more and more in prayer on what may sometimes feel like a never-ending road, I'm realizing that it's not enough to simply wait. I must also delight in Him, knowing that my joy doesn't rest in pleasant circumstances or in merely getting through difficulties, but simply in being fully one with Him. By uniting my heart with His and allowing Him to be my source of peace and fulfillment. And as we delight in God, the enormity of our circumstances seem to somewhat fade into the background because our eyes begin to rest on the certainty and hope He brings.

I think that part of the land of uncertainty that God has brought me to recently in so many different areas of my life is really a chance for me to experience some time of solitude with Him. To bask in who He is, to rest in His presence, knowing that in Him I am fully complete.

And I so desire that..to be so enthralled by Him that I lose myself. If only we could be so lost! Lost in awe and wonder of God's sovereignty, goodness, and mercy, lost in serving Him, lost in receiving all that He wishes to give..and to surrender everything we are in return. What a beautiful exchange of love Christ invites us into, what a mystery.

"Your presence is all I’m longing for here in the secret place
Your nearness is all I’m waiting for here in the quiet place,
Here in the secret place

My soul waits for you alone
Like the watchmen wait for dawn
Here I’ve finally found the place
Where we’ll meet, Lord, face to face

I’ve finally found where I belong,
I’ve finally found where I belong,
In Your presence
I’ve finally found where I belong,
To be with You, to be with You

I am my Beloved’s and He is mine,
So come into Your garden and take delight in me
Take delight in me

Here in Your presence God I find my rest
Here in Your presence God"

The waiting room

Our time here is so valuable. Not something to wasted or taken for granted. This we know in our hearts. Even society plants the idea in our heads with new innovations that can save our time. Drive-thrus, self-check outs, online shopping, online anything. We've even mastered multi-tasking on so many levels -  texting while driving (bad, BAD idea), movie theaters with dinner and a movie, the list is endless. However, more often then not...the more time we are given, the more time we waste. I can't even count how many hours I've spent on Facebook. The internet is a time-eating machine. For everything, we're encouraged to get fast-relief...taking medicine for even mild headaches. The habits are many, and the effects are endless.

And in the process of becoming an efficient people, we've picked up the "everything should run on our time" mentality. And it's actually a scary place to be. We no longer no what it means to wait patiently. If you want something, you're told to just go after it. Patience sometimes even seems to no longer be a virtue.  And lack of patience has led to increasing intolerance. Intolerance when experiencing the smallest doses of inconveniences, even intolerance of people.This can be seen especially during times of heavy traffic and in pretty much every store on Black Friday.

It's easy to get lost in a "the clock's ticking" mentality...but what if we slowed down? What if we took time to experience the wait? Long lines would mean a much-needed chance to pray, fellow drivers could be seen as broken people like us rather than as burdens, relationships might even be restored.

As we struggle to recognize that not everything is under our control, we also fail to recognize that there's beauty in giving up control and trusting in something greater than ourselves. We may have learned how to become progressive, productive people...but in the process we have also lost sight of some of the things that make us human - the beauty in suffering, the beauty in waiting.

Waiting patiently on God is one of the hardest lessons I've ever had to learn as a Christian, one that I still struggle with, one that I may always struggle with. It's hard to wait, hard to trust, and even harder to let go and give control to God. However, we're all called to wait. This is true for the family who waits with uncertainty for results in the waiting room of a hospital, the young couple that awaits the coming of their newborn baby girl, the poor father and husband who lives from paycheck to paycheck. But it's never comfortable. It's never easy. Even Jesus' three closest apostles struggled with this in the garden.

It's easy to be so caught up in getting through the difficult times that we experience that we forget to embrace them. These too come from our Lord's hands. These too have meaning and purpose.

Do we trust that what God has for us is worth the wait? That God has and always will have our good and only our good in mind? Not knowing what it means to wait on the Lord, we easily forget the part that we must play in this Christian waiting room - letting go of ourselves and being willing to accept anything and everything. This is faith. This is total love. And we must learn to be open to the beauty God has in store for us...in all seasons of our lives. The wait disciplines us. The wait creates hope in us. The wait forms us in His image. The wait is beautiful.

As in the time of Christ's resurrection on the third day after his death, this lifelong process of trusting and waiting through periods of uncertainty will prepare us as we wait on Christ's second coming, where He will meet His bride in the fullness of glory. I'm learning to embrace the wait. And believe me, it's been a difficult journey.
As David writes in Psalm 27:14, "Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart."

He truly is our soul's delight...Learning that more and more surely with each passing day. May we always await Him with eagerness with the inspiration of the Spirit.

‎"Love, in fact, means leaving yourself behind; giving yourself; not wanting to hold on to yourself, but becoming free from yourself. Love means not getting preoccupied with oneself, asking over and over again, “What will become of me?” It means looking ahead, toward another, toward God and to the people who He sends. It is this principle of love that defines man’s journey…" (Pope Benedict XVI)

Thoughts on empathy

Sometimes I can't help but say that the world is really lacking empathy. We sympathize with others (feel sorry) but rarely take on their own experiences as our own..We rarely become "one" with them. But Christ said, "Whatever you do to the least of my children, that you do unto me." So the opposite must also be true...whatever we fail to do for our brothers and sisters, we fail to do for Him who has done all for us..."who loved us to the end".

Lately, I have been soo absolutely blessed to experience and recognize this great calling of ours - to be one with one another - through my friends, through their willingness to give of themselves to me. It has really been a crazy past couple of weeks. Lots of little life changes, the typical busyness of school, and campus ministry has been occupying so much of my time, energy, and emotions. After this weekend especially, I hadn't been feeling too well, and throughout the entire day, I felt the support of my roommates. And through their love, I felt Christ himself. One made me dinner and provided me with medicine. Another offered me her cupcakes, which are I must say one of my greatest edible weaknesses. The other checked up on me every now and then to see how I was. Oh what love the Father has for his children! And I'm so amazed that He would express that to me through the selfelessness of those around me.

It's so easy to shrug off what others are going through. To assure them of our prayers but at the same time be distant and lost in our own problems, activities, desires. To listen and then turn away. But we have yet to fully know and understand the power that comes from putting their needs above our own and being Christ to each person around us, in whatever way we can.

May our desire to serve and please God be unconditional. May our love be sincere.

Jesus is the most important element of peace. Without Jesus, we can roll together as many virtues and good intentions, wishes and works as we want, but we will never have peace." - Homegrown Faith

When shall it be that we shall taste the sweetness of the Divine Will in all that happens to us, considering in everything only His good pleasure, by whom it is certain that adversity is sent with as much love as prosperity, and as much for our good? When shall we cast ourselves undeservedly into the arms of our most loving Father in Heaven, leaving to Him the care of ourselves and of our affairs, and reserving only the desire of pleasing Him, and of serving Him well in all that we can? -- St. Jane Frances de Chantal

"Nothing created has ever been able to fill the heart of man. God alone can fill it infinitely." St. Thomas Aquinas

"What a weakness it is to love Jesus Christ only when He caresses us, and to be cold immediately once He afflicts us. This is not true love. Those who love thus, love themselves too much to love God with all their heart." - St. Margaret Mary Alacoque

"Faith does not reinforce the pride of a sleeping conscience, the vainglory of people who make their own wishes the norm for their life, and who thus refashion grace so as to devalue both God and man...any one of us who is suffering and struggling can be certain that 'God is greater than our hearts' and that whatever my failures, I may be full of confident trust, because Christ suffered for me..." - Pope Benedict XVI

"When the heart is pure, love responds to love alone and has little to do with duty, obligation, requirement, or heroic anything. It is easy to surrender when you know that nothing but Love and Mercy is on the other side." — from Breathing Under Water

"We are all fragile, we are earth, and not every plot of land produces the fruit intended by the farmer. Let us always humble ourselves after our failures, recognizing that we are completely helpless without divine assistance." - Padre Pio

"Above all the grace and the gifts that Christ gives to his beloved is that of overcoming self." St.Francis of Assisi

Freedom to love

I love those days when God blows you away with the things He is doing - in your life, in the lives of others... in the world. Today was one of those days for me.

I was blessed with a text message from a friend, Andres, that I had lost touch with and learning about his walk with God was one of the most beautiful and real things I've ever experienced. I'm learning so much what it means to be Christ to others. And his story teaches me just that.

There is beauty in simplicity. There's just something about it that attracts you to it. Those who live in simplicity are able to experience a certain freedom that is hard to imagine in this day and age. A freedom from the stress of uncertainty, a freedom from the attachment to things, a freedom really....to love. To love without a care. This is the exact opposite of the freedom we hear about nowadays. When we think freedom, we naturally think about having everything we want; having things under our control; and using things, situations, and sometimes even people to our own "advantage". We rarely see freedom as the ability to give rather than get. But when we define freedom as these things...we fail to see and experience that freedom that God calls us to. Our lives become reduced to mere possessions, activities, and most of all to emptiness and ultimate dissatisfaction.

Living simply opens the door to love in such a profound way, which I am a great witness to through the life and love of this friend.  I remember when I first met him, and something I'll never forget that he mentioned  is how he doesn't out when he has something to eat at home. Hearing that made me think, "Wow. That's incredible. Could I ever do that? Or better yet, would I ever be willing to do that?"

And the thing I'm realizing more and more is that the things we often claim we "need" are often not needed. If only we made the sacrifices, we'd be so much happier. We would learn to not seek security, happiness, treasures, anything and slowly begin to seek that in the One who gives us all things. There lies our ultimate joy and hope. I long to be a living witness of that. I long to make the sacrifices I personally need to love Him and all of humanity in the way that God desires.

This same friend of mine recently decided to let go of many of his material things and began living in a van for the past 7 or so weeks. He realized how easy it is to get caught up in our own wealth, desires, and self-centered living and knew that he wanted more. He responded to a need to reach out to others and love them as Christ loves. And this lifestyle isn't at all easy. He puts up with the heat, the tiredness that comes with being out and about all day, and other inconveniences. But his struggles communicate the greatness of our God who transforms our lives to show us Himself, so that we can in turn share who He is with others. To me, Andres is a living example of what it means to seek to live a spirit-filled and radical lifestyle for the sake of the Gospel. He shares this in common with Christ, who showed us the same powerful, radical love at the cross and "loved us to the end". I can't wait to hear about his experiences and the little things God does in him and through him to shake up the world we live in.

Pray for him with me.

For more info, read his blog: http://www.vanliving.webs.com/

"Grant me, O Lord my God, a mind to know you, a heart to seek you, wisdom to find you, conduct pleasing to you, faithful perseverance in waiting for you, and a hope of finally embracing you."
- Saint Thomas Aquinas

The little things

I'd always heard that a smile can make a person's day. And I really believe that, but I haven't always found it to be true. Sometimes when I'm walking along around campus and happen to make eye contact with a complete stranger, my automatic response is to smile at them. And a lot of times, rather than being welcomed and encouraged by my smile...the person looks at me like I'm a weirdo. He or she has misunderstood me and I'm left a little discouraged. And sometimes when I'm at work as I say "Hi" to each student that I check-in, some completely ignore me. Why is that?

This is my guess. What's become the norm is acknowledging and respecting only those people you know and care about, helping only those that are there for you. It's become so deeply engraved in our minds that we rarely see outside of that perspective. It affects even the smallest of interactions. Our cashiers, those we ride the bus with, our teachers, the smart guy we use to help us get our homework done, those that stay long hours at the end of each day to clean up our messes after we've left the building. If we compared our interaction with a potential boss during an interview and our our interaction with our bus driver...we would see the difference. We treat each other based on how seemingly valuable or how relevant a person is to us. As John Paul II states in Love and Responsibility, this relates greatly to the personalist theory where a person is viewed as a means of achieving an end rather than as the dignified being they are.

Why do we smile at a stranger?

I think a smile means this - the recognition and appreciation of the masterful work of God and the dignity of the person as a creation of God. When we smile at another we see them as a person of beauty. We see a fellow being that shares with us the parenthood of God as Creator. We see a reflection of God's authorship and take delight in it. We also see a person who shares in our frail humanity - who has their own unique set of gifts, their own joys, struggles, experiences, yearnings. We see them as they are and love them, knowing that we are not any better than they. We acknowledge that they, like us, have been called to glorious living in Christ, whether this truth is yet realized or not. We see them through the loving eyes of a loving and merciful God and pray that they are able to see that too.

There is so much beauty in just a simple smile. If only we're willing to risk the awkward glances, the puzzled looks.

                 -------------------------------------------------------------

"Our Christian community should open us up to those with whom we share this planet all over the world. It should provide us with a means of solidarity, a sense that because we are members of a human family, created by God, we are all connected and even responsible for each other." - from Already There

"Courage. Suffice to know that that Jesus loves us greatly." - St. Padre Pio

"If God can work through me, He can work through anyone." - St.Francis of Assisi

“God our Father, you redeem us and make us your children in Christ. Look upon us, give us true freedom and bring us to the inheritance you promised. Grant this through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, forever and ever. Amen.” (Entrance Antiphon, 23 Wk of Ordinary Time)

It is the consolation and the superabundant goodness of God, that man is able to exult in such a treasure. Mary is his true Mother .. (Martin Luther - Sermon, Christmas, 1522)

The proof of love is in the works. Where love exists, it works great things. But when it ceases to act, it ceases to exist. -- Pope St. Gregory the Great

The power of healing

Today in my contemporary moral issues class, we had to share our responses on our essays and random questions we were asked. When my teacher asked me, "If you could have a superpower what would it be?", I answered "The power to heal - not just physical healing, but mental, spiritual, emotional. Healing in every sense of the word." And he responded, "That's interesting, others have always just said telekinesis, time travel, lightning speed...but you said you want a power that you can use not really for yourself but for others." And I said in reply, "I think we're all looking for healing in some way, so it would be good for everyone."

And even though I hadn't thought too hard about it when I chose healing...I started thinking about it some more afterwards. And I think that as Christians, who have experienced the healing hand of God, who've experienced His presence -which itself brings healing and renewal - we begin to desire that for others. We come to realize that He is the ultimate Healer and when we seek healing, we are really just seeking Him.

As soon as you identify yourself as Christian...you leave room for judgment. Seen automatically as pushy, forcing your beliefs on others, judgemental, close-minded, selfish. But really, Christians just want to bring healing. They just want to see themselves and others healed by the Gospel, being healed of sin, selfishness, impurity, anger, everything.

It's hard being in a morality class with 48 other students that each have their own view of what is morally acceptable. Honestly speaking, it's really intimidating. Sometimes I just want to pretend I'm not there so that I don't have to respond to views that I don't agree with, ones that break my heart to hear. But I remember the plan of God, I remember that He uses every experience and every challenge to help me grow and to help others grow.

Pray for me, that I always acknowledge the ways and design of God. That I always stand up for what is true and good and beautiful in a way that would please Him. Pray that others are drawn to that same truth, beauty, and, goodness that is ultilmately found in Christ.

In a world of relativism, how do we view life and love through the lens of God? I don't want to live up to the world's standards..what good will that do? I want to strive for God's. I want a share in glorious living He calls me to, one that opens me to the trueness and fullness of my identity.

Audrey Assad - Mapping the Landscape of Catholic Voices

"Flying in the face of the Protestant faith my family has held for many generations, I crossed the Tiber and became a Roman Catholic during the Easter vigil in the year 2007. To this convert, the Catholic Church presented herself as the answer to many questions that had plagued and rattled me for decades; I wrestled as a Protestant with why, like Bono, I still hadn't found what I was looking for. I set off on a journey to discover the truth and, to my shock and great delight, discovered that Rome was indeed "home."

I did and do take solace in the Church, as a sparrow makes a nest in an old, solid oak; the Church's very age and wisdom speak quietly for themselves, silently drawing in wanderers like me. Jesus loves wanderers and prodigals; and the Church must welcome them with open arms -- in my case, she did, and warmly at that.

I find it beautiful about Catholicism that worship, in her way, is not so much an experience as it is an act of the will; yes, the senses are engaged by the sweet, thick smell of incense at the alter, the soft flickering of candles, the otherworldly melodies of chant; but ultimately, as a Catholic, I go to Mass to worship -- to give Jesus the honor and glory He is worthy of; I go to Mass because I love Him.

I love Pope Benedict XVI particularly because it is the Church's very historicity that he symbolizes. He stands, unmoved, against the tides of post-modernism and materialism that ravage the West, (often) a lone voice in the battle. I admire and respect his staunch willingness to be Catholic -- theologically, intellectually, volitionally, and emotionally Catholic -- in a world where religious freedom and tolerance are preached by many, but where the Catholic voice has for centuries been either stifled or diluted. On the heels of the much-beloved John Paul II, any flimsier man would perhaps have been cowed; but Benedict, speaking with both grace and power, has preached Christ, and Him crucified, as the answer to the questions of every man -- Jew or Greek, Muslim or Hindu, black or white, man and woman.

Many despise his unwillingness to budge from a traditional, conservative position. I, on the other hand, rejoice in it. The Church doesn't need a babysitter or a mentor to sit in the seat of Peter; she needs a man with principles, a man of conviction. Pope Benedict XVI is "being" that for us. Americans in particular, I think (and I am obviously speaking as one), have issues with entitlement. We don't want rules and regulations; we want a pat on the back or the license to do as we please. Thankfully, Benedict is refusing to acquiesce, which in itself reveals his great respect for the dignity of man. He will not water down the message of Christ for the sake of seeker friendliness." -Audrey Assad

Oh, relativism.

Something I reread the other day from my journal about the idea of "cultural holiness" ...which has really come up recently. It affects the way we perceive the world, others, and ourselves.

Many of us have felt in our hearts a personal call to holiness, that God has called us to be "conformed in His image." And this is a great truth of our Christian lives. But many times we set the bar too low because we don't realize the great heights to which God desires to have us reach. The idea of holiness becomes relative. I'm "holy" compared to so-and-so. Christians become caught up in this idea of "adapt(ing) to the character and behavior pattern of Christians around..." them. "As the Christian culture around them is more or less holy, so these Christians are more or less holy. But God has not called us to be like those around us. He has called us to be like himself (I'm not sure who the author was...)."

Holiness begins with God - not ourselves. Only in looking to Him do we come to know and are able to live true holiness.

"Purity is not something negative; it is not just an unopened bud; it is not something cold; it is not ignorance of life. Is justice merely the absence of dishonesty? Is mercy merely the absence of cruelty? Is faith merely the absence of doubt? Purity is not merely the absence of sensuality; it is selflessness born of love and the highest love of all."-Archbishop Fulton Sheen

"How liberating it is to be a Christian!"...For those in Christ, "positive things [become] a reason for gratitude and joy. Negative things [become] an opportunity for abandonment, faith, and offering. Everything [becomes] grace!" - Fr.Alfonse Navarro

"Dear young people, today Christ is asking you the same question which he asked the Apostles: “Who do you say that I am?” Respond to him with generosity and courage, as befits young hearts like your own. Say to him: “Jesus, I know that you are the Son of God, who have given your life for me. I want to follow you faithfully and to be led by your word. You know me and you love me. I place my trust in you and I put my whole life into your hands. I want you to be the power that strengthens me and the joy which never leaves me.”
- Benedict XVI

"Be the kind of man that when you wake up in the morning the devil says 'Oh crap he's up' "
-Nathan Wiatrek

LOL.

Pope Benedict XVI - WYD Prayer Vigil Message (not the full text)

"How can a young person be true to the faith and yet continue to aspire to high ideals in today’s society? In the Gospel we have just heard, Jesus gives us an answer to this urgent question: “As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love” (Jn 15:9).

Yes, dear friends, God loves us. This is the great truth of our life; it is what makes everything else meaningful. We are not the product of blind chance or absurdity; instead our life originates as part of a loving plan of God. To abide in his love, then, means living a life rooted in faith, since faith is more than the mere acceptance of certain abstract truths: it is an intimate relationship with Christ, who enables us to open our hearts to this mystery of love and to live as men and women conscious of being loved by God.

If you abide in the love of Christ, rooted in the faith, you will encounter, even amid setbacks and suffering, the source of true happiness and joy. Faith does not run counter to your highest ideals; on the contrary, it elevates and perfects those ideals. Dear young people, do not be satisfied with anything less than Truth and Love, do not be content with anything less than Christ.

Nowadays, although the dominant culture of relativism all around us has given up on the search for truth, even if it is the highest aspiration of the human spirit, we need to speak with courage and humility of the universal significance of Christ as the Saviour of humanity and the source of hope for our lives. He who took upon himself our afflictions, is well acquainted with the mystery of human suffering and manifests his loving presence in those who suffer. They in their turn, united to the passion of Christ, share closely in his work of redemption. Furthermore, our disinterested attention towards the sick and the forgotten will always be a humble and warm testimony of God’s compassionate regard.

Dear friends, may no adversity paralyze you. Be afraid neither of the world, nor of the future, nor of your weakness. The Lord has allowed you to live in this moment of history so that, by your faith, his name will continue to resound throughout the world."

“Father, I abandon myself into your hands; do with me what you will. Whatever you may do, I thank you: I am ready for all, I accept all. Let only your will be done in me, and in all your creatures. I wish no more than this, O Lord. Into your hands I commend my soul; I offer it to you with all the love of my heart, for I love you, Lord, and so need to give myself, to surrender myself into your hands, without reserve, and with boundless confidence, for you are my Father.” (St. Charles de Foucald)

A video from a good friend's facebook :)

Recap of an Italy Pilgrimage (2011)

"And only where God is seen does life truly begin. Only when we meet the living God in Christ do we know what life is. We are not some casual and meaningless product of evolution. Each of us is the result of a thought of God. Each of us is willed, each of us is loved, each of us is necessary. There is nothing more beautiful than to be surprised by the Gospel, by the encounter with Christ. There is nothing more beautiful than to know Him and to speak to others of our friendship with Him." (Pope Benedict XVI)

WYD final mass, 8/21/11, Cuantos Vientos Air Base, Madrid

On faith and the person of Christ:

The Gospel we have just heard (cf. Mt 16:13-20) suggests two different ways of knowing Christ. The first is an impersonal knowledge, one based on current opinion. When Jesus asks: “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?”, the disciples answer: “Some say John the Baptist, but others Elijah, and still others Jeremiah or one of the prophets”. In other words, Christ is seen as yet another religious figure, like those who came before him. Then Jesus turns to the disciples and asks them: “But who do you say that I am?” Peter responds with what is the first confession of faith: “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God”. Faith is more than just empirical or historical facts; it is an ability to grasp the mystery of Christ’s person in all its depth.

Yet faith is not the result of human effort, of human reasoning, but rather a gift of God: “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah! For flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but my Father in heaven”. Faith starts with God, who opens his heart to us and invites us to share in his own divine life. Faith does not simply provide information about who Christ is; rather, it entails a personal relationship with Christ, a surrender of our whole person, with all our understanding, will and feelings, to God’s self-revelation. So Jesus’ question: “But who do you say that I am?”, is ultimately a challenge to the disciples to make a personal decision in his regard. Faith in Christ and discipleship are strictly interconnected.

And, since faith involves following the Master, it must become constantly stronger, deeper and more mature, to the extent that it leads to a closer and more intense relationship with Jesus. Peter and the other disciples also had to grow in this way, until their encounter with the Risen Lord opened their eyes to the fullness of faith.

Dear young people, today Christ is asking you the same question which he asked the Apostles: “Who do you say that I am?” Respond to him with generosity and courage, as befits young hearts like your own. Say to him: “Jesus, I know that you are the Son of God, who have given your life for me. I want to follow you faithfully and to be led by your word. You know me and you love me. I place my trust in you and I put my whole life into your hands. I want you to be the power that strengthens me and the joy which never leaves me”.

Fulltext:http://bluepanjeet.net/2011/08/22/12123/full-text-wyd-2011-madrid-final-mass-homily-of-pope-benedict-xvi/

WYD homily, 8/18/11, Plaza de Cibeles, Madrid

"Dear young people, listen closely to the words of the Lord, that they may be for you “spirit and life” (Jn 6:63), roots which nourish your being, a rule of life which likens us – poor in spirit, thirsting for justice, merciful, pure in heart, lovers of peace – to the person of Christ. Listen regularly every day as if he were the one friend who does not deceive, the one with whom we wish to share the path of life. Of course, you know that when we do not walk beside Christ our guide, we get lost on other paths, like the path of our blind and selfish impulses, or the path of flattering but self-serving suggestions, deceiving and fickle, which leave emptiness and frustration in their wake." (Pope Benedict XVI)

http://bluepanjeet.net/2011/08/20/12071/full-text-pope-benedict-xvis-homily-welcoming-ceremony-plaza-de-cibeles/

‎"I love You, O my God, and my only desire is to love You until the last breath of my life. I love You, O my infinitely lovable God, and I would rather die loving You, than live without loving You. I love You, Lord and the only grace I ask is to love You eternally...My God, if my tongue cannot say in every moment that I love You, I want my heart to repeat it to You as often as I draw breath."                                            
                                                                                     -  St. John Vianney                                                                       

The heart of the matter

Narrator: “Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young prince lived in a shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired, the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind. But then, one winter's night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and offered him a single rose in return for shelter from the bitter cold. Repulsed by her haggard appearance, the prince sneered at the gift and turned the old woman away. But she warned him not to be deceived by appearances, for beauty is found within. And when he dismissed her again, the old woman's ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress. The prince tried to apologize, but it was too late, for she had seen that there was no love in his heart. And as punishment, she transformed him into a hideous beast and placed a powerful spell on the castle and all who lived there. Ashamed of his monstrous form, the beast concealed himself inside his castle, with a magic mirror as his only window to the outside world. The rose she had offered was truly an enchanted rose, which would bloom until his 21st year. If he could learn to love another, and earn her love in return by the time the last petal fell, then the spell would be broken. If not, he would be doomed to remain a beast for all time. As the years passed, he fell into despair and lost all hope. For who could ever learn to love a beast?” (Beauty and the Beast)

I may be exaggerating. Probably. But we girls are so hard on ourselves sometimes. Our response may at times resemble that of the beast, “Who could ever love me?”

What is beauty? Society says it means keeping up with the latest fashion trends. Buying overpriced beauty products. It looks at the exterior. Sometimes it almost seems as if beauty is measureable. And girls fall into this way of thinking. They begin comparing one person’s beauty with another’s. We begin to judge others around us and when we see through this lens, we ultimately fail to capture the picture of beauty that God intended when He created us.

We were made for beauty. But not Glamour magazine’s idea of beauty. Beauty is more than skin deep. The One who made us tells us that it’s not just about the body, the exterior. It’s about the heart.  

And sometimes when we girls look inside ourselves, we can’t help but think..."Nothing beautiful in there either." This struggle with feelings of inadequacy makes sense. There is a lot lacking in us and we know it. This is the hole every girl tries to fill. And we ask God, “God, do you see me flawed and sinful and still call me beautiful? Do you see the loneliness? Do you see me struggle? Do you see the unmet desires of my heart? Do you see me trying to manipulate and control? Do you see me yearn for the things I can’t have? Do you see me cry for time that is lost and the life I will not know? God, do you see me in all this mess and still think I’m beautiful? (Do You Think I’m Beautiful – Angela Thomas)”

The deeper beauty that a girl longs for is about complete acceptance. A girl wants to be known, desired, and pursued.

“When God looks into the eyes of a woman, He sees all the beauty He created there. He sees every potential and every gift. He sees what can be and redeems what has been. He loves the curly hair that you wish were straight. He is taken with your smile and the shape of your nose. He’s crazy about big feet and knobby knees and every curve that is particular to you. He is the One who loves the inside and the outside of you. You were all His idea, and you are physically and emotionally beautiful to Him. (Angela Thomas)”

The more I recognize my inadequacies, the more I must acknowledge His greatness. But I also have to remember that His plan for me is beautiful. He has made me beautiful. He is making me beautiful. He is the source of every good thing. And He tells me I am good. Why? Because I’m His. 

God had something beautiful in mind when He made me a woman. The devil is trying to use it for my destruction. He twists everything.  He’s trying to rob me of my identity, my dignity as a person created in the image and likeness of God. Help, holy spirit! 


As St. Rose of Lima once said, "Only beauty of the soul is worthwhile." May His Spirit enter our hearts and thus form us in the beauty God intended for us. All other pursuit of beauty leaves us tired, hurt, and deeply unsatisfied.

Buried treasure

Today's gospel reading was absolutely beautiful.
Jesus said to his disciples:
“The Kingdom of heaven is like a treasure buried in a field,
which a person finds and hides again,
and out of joy goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.
Again, the Kingdom of heaven is like a merchant
searching for fine pearls.
When he finds a pearl of great price,
he goes and sells all that he has and buys it.” (Mt 13:44-46)


It's true when God says that where our treasure is, there also our heart will be. 
Sometimes we try to deny that this is the case  so that we can justify ourselves and continue to store up these treasures - whether they be our image, possessions, relationships, anything. But the truth is... they will never be enough. I could dig and dig and dig every corner of the world, searching for some earthly thing that could fill the empty void in my heart that I may feel at times, but I would be digging in vain. I would be trying to fill a hole that only Christ can fill. He is that treasure.

And He is the greatest treasure. Do we believe it? And not only that, but do we live like we believe it? Are we willing to give away all our other "treasures" that hinder us from fully loving and fully trusting in God's plan, knowing that He alone suffices. Do we recognize the great gift of salvation that Christ won for us...or are we still digging? Are we still on a treasure hunt? 

God, let your love, your mercy, and your truth fill all the empty holes of my life. May I always keep my eyes fixed on Your kingdom. Amen

Learning to love

Sometimes it's hard to love, sometimes it almost hurts. Like Mother Teresa says, "I have found the paradox that if we love until it hurts, there is no hurt, but only more love." And I think this is the hardest part of a Christian's journey because we want to follow Christ but we find that being Christ to others is extremely difficult. And I think Jesus knew that when he said, "This is how the world will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another." He didn't say...if you understand everything I've told you, if you have wisdom, knowledge, can do miracles, speak in tongues. The world knows us by our love. Loving is an essential part of the gospel, but sometimes it takes a lot of time and grace. 

Let's pray for each other. 

Happily, ever after – separating the fact from fiction

I know I’m 20, but I have to admit…I’m a huge Disney Princess fan. And Disney taught me a lot growing up. Cinderella, the Little Mermaid, Sleeping Beauty, and Snow White are prime examples. When young girls are put to bed, they’re often told stories about a princess finding her prince…and how the two lived happily ever after.

And these stories really become a part of them. They begin to dream about their own kingdom far, far away...their own prince..their own story of love. But I think the reason girls tend to hold on to these fairy tale ideas (well maybe just this girl) is because they speak something to the heart of a woman. God breathed into her a desire to love and be loved. It’s what she was made for. It wraps around the core of her existence, her purpose, the very essence of her being. He desired for her to be in complete union with this love – His love. And she sets out on the journey, waiting to find that special someone…the one she’s told will be her knight in shining armor.

But here’s the dangerous part. We often fail to see, as young women, these desires in the light of God’s plan. In the light of truth. And we end up giving into the lies of society. We choose to take the poisonous apple, touch the needle of the spinning wheel’s spindle, kiss a real frog.

I hate to be the bearer of bad news. And I don’t mean to sound like a pessimist. But there’s no guy in the world that could rescue me from every danger. There’s no guy that could complete me. There’s no guy that could be my all in all. Every person I know will at some point disappoint me, will at one point fail me.

And I think it’s important to remember that. The idea of "true love" that I see on the screen in a Disney movie should be sought after and does exist, but it’s not the fulfillment I could ever find in another created being. It’s something much greater than that. 

The world tells a girl: A girl’s wedding day is supposed to be like the best day of her life. Her future spouse is going to complete her and be her one, true love. He’s her knight in shining armor. He’ll be perfect in every way. But these expectations are false and can cause a girl to seriously misunderstand marriage and love as a whole. It gives her the impression that in her earthly marriage is where she'll find ultimate fulfillment. But the truth is, marriage points to that ultimate fulfillment in Christ. The best day of my life will not be my wedding day. It'll probably always be each new day I experience…because I have come to know Christ and experience his love a little bit more than I had. Each day brings grace anew! And with each new day I’m transformed and made a little more to fit His image. My past experiences continue to shape me and I am closer to the day I will be forever with my God.

 Be careful not to give into the Father of Lies, but allow God to transform you from the inside out.

Don't ask me why I was thinking about this today (I don't even know where God is calling me yet), but I want my wedding day (if that is what He desires for me) to be a reflection of what I want my marriage to look like. I want it to be completely Christ-centered. So yes, it’s about me and my future spouse…a celebration of our love. But not a love that points to each other and how awesome we are…but that points to Him and how awesome He is. Because no matter what I go through in my marriage (no matter what difficulties, suffering, tests I experience)… I want to glorify Him. It has to be about that. Marriage is not always easy. Marriage is not always fun. But I believe that God is going to use my marriage to really sanctify me and lead me to Him. I want people to walk out of my wedding ceremony and know the awesome love that God has…I hope when people see me and my spouse, they are able to see God’s love in the flesh. Some will leave thinking nothing but…”They’re such a cute couple” or “They ran out of wine (sound familiar?)” or “I loved her dress” or “They had a really nice color scheme”…but I hope that it can be about more than those technicalities. I don’t want to walk into my marriage with all these false expectations. I know that I’m not always going to be understood, I may not always be loved, I’m not always going to be cared for the way God intended for me to. I might get hurt, I might be dishonored, I might feel really alone at times. My future spouse could really hurt me sometimes. I’ll make mistakes, my husband will make mistakes. But we’ll get through it, we’ll be faithful to each other and the promise that we make to God. We’ll learn what it means to love as Christ loves. And I will be committed to caring for him, loving him, and getting to know him a little more each day (never assuming that what I see in him in a moment of anger is all there is to him). God sees my whole person, and I want to do the same with my future spouse.  And anything we go through, we won’t go through alone.  God will form us and teach us. He’ll pick us up and carry us through those difficulties. My hope and trust all rests in the truth of His power, His goodness, His glory.

 I would encourage each girl (and I mean this - from my heart to yours) to allow God to write your love story. And not just that, let Him BE your love story. For without Him, there is no love. And in Him is perfect love. It’s not a fairy tale. It’s as real as it can get. Put your hope and trust in His love and mercy. And “hope does not disappoint us, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit which has been given to us" (Romans 5:5). Nothing else satisfies. In Him we are complete. Everything that leads us away from this truth instead of towards it is a counterfeit.

 “For God so LOVED the world that He gave His only Son, so that everyone who believes in Him might not perish but might have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)

“For me, prayer is a surge of the heart; it is a simple look turned toward heaven, it is a cry of recognition and of love, embracing both trial and joy.”

—	St. Thérèse de Lisieux

“who can tell me what is most pleasing to God that I may do it?”

—	Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha

“If anyone comes to me, I want to lead them to Him.”

—	St. Edith Stein

“To proclaim Jesus Christ the only Savior of the world seems more complex today than in the past; but our task remains the same as at the dawn of our history. The mission has not changed, just as the enthusiasm and the courage that moved the Apostles and the first disciples must not change.”

—	Pope Benedict XVI

Letting Go - Matt Maher

Unborn but not Unloved

The truth of the Gospel sets me free…free to love. To love others more than myself. And Christ extended love (poured out love) to the defenseless, to those neglected, unloved and despised. I feel called to do the same. This means to stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves. For the unborn. The womb is supposed to be the safest place in the world…but it’s become the most attacked. At the last pro-life I went to, there was someone pushing an empty stroller..and there was one empty stroller to represent every year since Roe vs. Wade. And it was really eye-opening to reflect on all those who were not given the chance a life. Dr. Seuss is right, “A person’s a person no matter how small.” All of creation is beautiful and should be treated with the dignity God intended. This dignity should be fought after, to the best of one’s ability….as much as I am able. If I care for someone, when I see anything that could hurt him or her…I would do anything in my power to defend and protect that person. I must do the same for my unborn brothers and sisters. Its my duty as a fellow human being, a fellow child of God.

I really admire those who commit themselves to praying in front of abortion center. I believe in the power of prayer…but I’ve never gone. Why not? Lives could be changed if we just opened our heart to love. We give ourselves labels: ”I’m Christian.” “I’m pro-life”…but we must ask ourselves, are we really? Do our lives show it? Or is it something we wish we were but aren’t willing to make the sacrifices necessary to truly be.” Just saying something and wishing it was a reality doesn’t make it so.  That’s the sad truth. Why have I never thought about it before enough to do anything? I don’t know the answer to that. But I want things to change. Just as a doctor who sees the tiniest movements of an unborn baby is held to a greater responsibility over upholding the little person’s humanity and dignity…a true believer in the gospel is held responsible for the living out of those beliefs (sharing it with others, having faith that translates into love). I am called to love as Christ did.

1 Corinthians 13:1-13

“1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.2 And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.  4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. 7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.   8 Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away. 11 When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways. 12 For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known. 13 So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”

Father God, give me a renewed love for the unborn and for those who are involved in the destruction of these lives, so that I may commit myself to doing whatever I am called to do to protect and defend them. Heal all mothers that have experienced the loss of a child, whether due to their own “choice”, a miscarriage, or for any other reason. Show them your healing power and welcome them into your arms of love. Amen.

Stewardship - Mine, Yours, Ours

We all know that there’s a difference between borrowing something and owning it. We check out library books for short periods of time, but they’re not ours. They belong to the library. When I rent out an apartment for my time on campus,  it is considered “mine” but I know that once my lease ends, I’ll move on to a new place. And when we’re put as a caretaker over something….we literally take care of it. And we’re careful (full of care), because we know that it belongs to someone else and that it has been entrusted to us for a short time. And that’s just the thing….they’ve trusted us with it. To not care for it in the way its owner intended is to break their trust. We should have the same attitude about things God has made us caretaker of and treat them as something lent out to us. But this includes more than our material possessions.

We’re called to be good stewards over relationships with those around us. This extends to our family, friends, significant others, and even acquaintances that slip in and out of our lives. God invites us to bring Him into every friendship that we have made. True friendship seeks the good of the other person. This is also true in dating relationships. This means that if I know that I could never eVER EVER consider marrying the guy I’m dating, then I’m using him physically (his body), emotionally (his heart), and spiritually (his spirit) to meet my needs (whether those needs are to just plain have something to do, to be like all my friends who are in relationships, to increase my self-esteem, or because I don’t want to hurt him by saying “no” to him). And there’s a difference between considering marriage with the guy and knowing I’ll marry him. I should clarify - I won’t always know how something will end up, but by dating someone and engaging in intimacy with him I have to be open to something more. If not, then I must consider whether or not I’m just using him for the time being. And he could be a great guy, but I don’t have to date every great guy…I can be a good friend to him. Friendship is a beautiful thing that God can use if we just let Him.

We are also called to be stewards of our talents and abilities by cultivating them and using them in the service of our Lord rather than keeping them to ourselves. This is something I’ve always struggled with. Because the self-conscious part of me sometimes tells myself that I don’t really have any talents and abilities that could be used in service. I tell myself, “Well, I’m okay at that but…” My hesitance shows my lack of trust that God will not only call me but also equip me. He doesn’t just send me into a battlefield without armor and a shield and expect me to fight. In the same way that Moses was instructed to use his staff to divide the Red Sea, so will slowly God reveal to us how we can use our talents and abilities (essentially, what He’s equipped us with) to carry out his Will.

 And most of all, God desires that we’d be good stewards of our time (because that includes everything else).  Time as in our whole lifespan. Time as in each moment we are given. And to be a good steward of our time all goes back to this “everything is Yours” idea. This perspective changes our reactions to everything we experience –whether it be loss, rejection, anything we suffer. We are able to see the beauty that lies in and beyond our experiences. And that truth is, if we truly believe this and give our time here over to God to use however He wishes, we will be so much more at peace. Because then, when my dad stops me from heading out the door to give me a lecture right when I’m running late to a meeting with a friend…I can embrace him and what he’s saying rather than dismiss him so I can do “my own thing.” And then, when a friend of mine is going through a difficult break-up and is rambling on and on about the person they care about, instead of seeing my time spent with them as me setting aside “my own time to help out a friend” I can see it as an opportunity to love and support.

And it’s not that everything is only God’s and not ours. We cooperate with God’s plan by accepting Him into our life. Our family, friends, material blessings, skills are gifts of His love. They’re things that are not entirely ours, but not something God shares with us to help us. He loves to share everything that is His with us. We were made to share in Him – His love, His glory, His kingdom.   God wants me to make this life on earth my own but asks that I look beyond this life and recognize its temporal nature. That I have a heart that’s willing to fully give back.

Knowing that I am a steward can change my perspective on everything. And ultimately, this gives me love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, and self-control. God fills me with the gifts of the spirit. How beautiful – to know that when I recognize that I am only a steward of these things, God is able to fill me all the more and prepare me for that eternal union with Him in His kingdom.

Sometimes we feel bad when people that were once close to us now have a new friend. We feel like we’ve been replaced. “She was my friend first”, we remark. But if we appreciate what a great gift that person is, we are not only willing but want to share them with the world around us.

St. Therese of Leiseux is such a great example of someone who lived as though nothing was her own (She’s really just a great example in general). She embraced poverty, knowing that everything we have is a blessing. St. Therese became indifferent to claiming even credit for her ideas and feelings.

She once said, “If I told a sister some enlightenment that came to me in prayer and if she later disclosed it as if it were hers, I was inclined to think she had stolen my property.”

St. Therese calls it a pathetic human weakness.

“If I think of something and speak about it and the other sisters like the idea, I find it quite natural that they should grab it as if it belonged to them, for such a thought is the Holy Ghost’s not mine.”

What a beautiful attitude! May God help us to be true stewards of His blessings - never seeking to store up what we consider valuable, but letting go and looking always to Him and to His promise.

“Be careful how you live. You may be the only bible some people ever read.”

—	Author unknown

The Great Deceiver

Something someone spoke about on 910 AM radio:

 The enemy is nonsensical. We can see when something is the work of the great deceiver.

 A woman couldn’t afford an abortion so she shot herself in the womb to kill her 6-week-old fetus. She was charged for 3rd degree manslaughter. The paper states that she killed her baby girl, when the baby is otherwise referred to as a fetus. What makes it against the law? That the procedure was done in her home rather than a hospital room? That some medical doctors and nurses were deprived of some money? What makes the same act perfectly legal and even a “right” in one situation, but against the law in another? Society attempts to sugarcoat the truth of the ugliness of the issue using words like abortion instead of murder, a fetus instead of a baby, a woman’s choice over what to do with her own body rather than motherhood.  But that doesn’t change the truth of it.

Like Larry Parrault once said:

“Isn’t that remarkable? There are illegal and legal ways to kill unborn children. We are more likely to call it “illegal” when we have an emotional reaction that it’s yucky.”

Its sad to see the many things that have become twisted in modern society. 

What our world has come to:

1. We’re trying to end life in the womb (abortion) and recreate life outside of the womb (stem cell research). Isn’t that absurd?

2. We sometimes see the gift of bearing life as somewhat of a burden. I hear many people nowadays say things like, “I’m not sure if I want kids” or “I just want one.” We fail to realize the great blessing of being able to raise holy families. God has such great plans for family life. If only we were open to it.

3. In God’s word, “knowing one another” often refers to sexual intimacy. However, a girl once came on the Jay Leno Show and talked about going to a bar to get picked up. When asked if she knew the names of those guys she “hooked up” with, she remarked, “Oh no, that would be too personal.” What a contrast!

4. Some time ago, adultery was unheard of and something punishable by death. But sadly, infidelity has become what’s common, expected. Long-lasting marriages are almost rare and applauded as accomplishments, rather than as the standard.

5. Where has faithfulness gone? Even in our friendships. We have millions of friends on facebook, but we struggle to find a faithful friend in our own lives -those that are committed to our betterment and encourage us to be men and women of God.

Thank the Lord for mercy. Thank the Lord for grace. Lets commit to praying for each other and offering whatever support we can to our brothers and sisters.